An updave for your computer.

Hello, yes i'm back which feels like months since my last post but never mind its been for a good reason or i should say reasons.

i have been a  machine these last few days, i think the promise of finally finishing has given me a boost and i feel as if i'm possessed by a doing work spirit.

i finished my brand sector analysis which was a lot harder to do than i just said. 3 days no sleep, phoning in every favour i possessed for help, to make sure it was as good as it could possibly be. F***ING BRAND MAPS are bastards. But it was handed in leaving the Final Major project to go. Which is great because it's branding my own guitar store which is my all time dream :)

So what else have I been doing, well... I have been working in a design agency (nick cannons studio) where i have been honing my skills in graphic design and also strategy and working on my client handling. This however opened all sorts of doors. I have taken on a few branding projects one of which could see me spending some of my last summer in the Carribean (pause for effect) and various others including a website and re-brand of a special event. Lots and Lots of practical experience all doing me good except it has left me completely afraid of answering my phone :s.

Over the last few weeks nearly every phone call that i have received has been a client. what's so scary about that dave? well imagine having a director of a company talking to you like an equal respecting your opinion and liking your ideas! my only critic these days seems to be my mother.

Ok dave now your mental... Well for me personally its a very odd experience, many of the creatives I meet have final thumb print syndrome where they will say anything about your work to make it so that it is theirs or was saved by their creativity. There is nothing more on this planet i hate more than someone suggesting a completely bollocks improvement to my work, i just nod and smile but secretly there being choked on their own pen inside my head :)

So yeah what's meant to be an ego or even self esteem boosting experience just makes me feel awkward, i'm a complicated chap. I'm under no delusions of my own brilliance, i guess i have just been very lucky with the clients i have at the moment :) long may it last.

The major thing on my plate other than my major project is my degree show, I spent a lot of time and effort developing an idea with a friend of mine and we came up with a concept for the pre-determined title DIALOGUE, the idea was to have our work looked at through the context of our personalities by giving yourself a line that describes your self and your role.

A lot of people liked it, mostly because of how cost effective it was and how easy it would be to do, in fact i think they only took it because of the font i chose, i have mad font picking skills!

Anyway so yeah a mixed reaction but a major portfolio piece for me as its some of the best design i have done and so i'm waiting to get my teeth into that.

Other than that i haven't done much...

Tornado

Hands up who can drive?... well i can't, i don't know why or how i just never got round to learning. It takes a long time to learn and be able to drive a car, not to mention the money. My way was simple, just pay 60 quid for doing a days CBT (compulsory basic training) which i admit i should have failed seeing as though i crashed the bike and split my knee open... but none the less i had a license of sorts.

So there she is, my motorbike/moped hybrid aka TORNADO, thus named because Zorro's horse is very fast and black and my bike is also black... I wanted to write a blog about her because she makes up a lot of my fondest memories of university, she may not be the fastest bike ever but she all ways got me where i needed to go.. well mostly but the break downs were as memorable as the moving journeys.

100 miles to the gallon, tenner at a time of premium, i know i know, premium! so she was very student friendly, plus when walking around town in my really nice bike jacket know one would know that she topped 45 miles an hour down hill with the wind behind her. Nope i was a hells angel with a massive red L sticker on my hog.

I took this picture of where she lives in a lovely shed and every morning when i go to wake her she always looks as if she's gazing out of the window as if wanting freedom a lust for the road, speed really isn't everything because i get to enjoy a lot more of the ride including f***ing off the drivers of cars :)

Yes people make fun and i join in the jokes because at the end of the day it is very funny and i would say i wouldn't trade her in for the world but i'm all ready planning to so there's no moral to this story bar that moped hybrids are the way to ride, if they work properly.

Flat hunting

Have started the process of finding a new place to live after its all over and i have to say it was a pleasurable experience!

i might have got this wrong and theres something i'm missing and if i have please comment and tell me why but in my second year i moved into my first student house and it cost the 5 of us 300 pounds each for a tiny (fucking shit) 4 bedroomed house (the living room was converted into an extra bedroom) so thats 1500 pounds a month into Mrs X's grinch like hands.

i was nearly panicking when i saw the rents for a brand new flat on the new developed docks in ipswich, which was £450 a month plus bills and I will have to be paying taxes without my lovely student loan to make me feel better, welcome to the real financial world! which by the way is in recession... yeah...  However Mel explained to me that that was between us and so was only really £225 for a flat that is as big as the house, brand new furniture and kitchen, and with out having to share everything and with student houses you can imagine what gets shared... etc etc and Mels mother in law (a nice one don't believe Disney! she's actually a fairy god mother) swooped in and said she would pay the deposit on where ever we found.

So there's another big item checked off my list. Well nearly i have to find some where to live and a job that can pay for it and can get to with out having to resort to living outside it in a tent.

i feel very lucky as i have a pretty tight support system so if i go mad from the pressure or balls it up some how, i'm pretty sure my mum would welcome my gibbering drooling self back with open arms :) unitll 2 years later when i'm still there no job and spend my nights sobbing with a bottle of jack daniels... thats a big kidding!

An ODE to ABC

I don't know for sure how other 3rd year students are feeling but at the moment i keep getting flashes of  just how close to finishing my degree is.

Now for some subjects they have along way to go but my finishing line is just months away, still stuff to do but as for lectures and studying with my course mates, it's over.

No more stumbling in on a tuesday morning looking god awful because the SU had its main night on a monday!

No more staying up all night constantly texting other groups to try and find out what the other groups have done to make you feel better.

No more mitigating circumstances! 

No More slagging off the lecturers for not understanding our brilliance

No more no consequences for cocking up royally

No more, "where's pete?"

No more "I disagree!"

No more "shut up matt and dave"

No more "any questions... except george?"

No more "NAH NAH NAH"

No more emotional out bursts from luke! (i know!)

No more  being forced to act nice to each other when waiting for a tutorial with Gareth, when really you wanna say fuck off because your so pissed off and want to go home

No more Francescos pep talks... where would we be with out those... think about it

No more SU unless your really sad and come back when you've left *shakes head*

No more lauren rallying us together to get up off our arses

No more will and his flipping AUDI!!!

No more wilf my god no more wilf... thats like an institution

No more matt and dave plugging their music in presentations

No more amazingly elaborate presentations from Rach or Gem

No more NASA calculations to decipher what the hell chris and greg just explained

No more who the hell knows what with Kirsty and Becky!

and No more any one else that I have neglected to mention i might have liked you who knows ;)

No more ABC or the original ABM as i like to think of it and its a daunting thought maybe we should just start our own agency?

I won't lie i'm not a good a friend to some as i am to others, some may hate me some might secretly love me but for three years they have made up my a huge part of all my human interaction (some of them reading this are thinking what the hell is he talking about...) but I don't think any of us have thought how weird it is gonna be to not be studying together.

So this is an ode to the people who made coming to university a truly terrifying but brilliant experience lol most of them are very talented but above all just nice people (most of them)

and i wish them all the luck in the world in what ever they do afterwards because i reckon a lot of us will be feeling like paddington in the coming months.

I realise this has nothing to do with anyone bar my course mates but its my blog so there.

Do you expect me talk? No I expect you to leave!!!

It was a very close shave but I had to talk (literally) my way back into my job! and on Valentines day of all days, wheres the love? indeed! 

A big thanks to the official witness to my disciplinary who understood logic (well my logic).

Afterwards my boss could have made me wither and die with that stare, obviously wanted me to leave as the grounds for the whole thing was so ridiculous but I got my own back by spending a load of money on uniform with the lovely allowance I get :) then I spent valentines getting trollied with my fiance :)

Probably not what my creative communication skills were meant for but proves I'm damn good! 

Lets hope next time I can talk my way into a job that I actually want :)

Your Fired!!! or not, i'll get back to you...

i went back to my part time job today, after a great holiday and it was like a nice big hug, if the person i was hugging was a naked old man covered in razor blades which were tipped with aids infested acid.

Might have over exaggerated a bit but only slightly. So, why such an elaborate analogy well my boss called me into the office along with the assistant manager to give me a bollocking for going to Paris with out telling them. Now maybe i was away from England longer than i thought because i was positive before i left that telling the assistant manager and the sunday manager 3 days before my shift was an adequate enough english custom to leave them enough time to find cover for what was only a 4 hour shift.

Apparently not... at 2 o clock on Wednesday i was gazing upon the amazing venus de milo when my phone goes off... it's from work of course i ignored them because what would i have said       "Oh Hi, i'm sorry i'll be right there i'm just in the louvre right now but hang on... !) fucking idiots!

So any hoo on wednesday i'll know if i still have my job, now i hate that job so much it gives me energy, in fact i get up early in the morning just to hate it because there is not enough time during the day but it pays the bills so fingers crossed... i guess it could battle harden me for if i get fired in the future.

Team Melave

Me and Mel have started up our own running team, one of those cute couple things... but I love it! of course I turned it into another opportunity to do some graphic design and came up with an aggressive logo (we're both very competitive!) made with the joined version of both our names. It is just a bit of fun but it is cool to be in a sort of official running team especially my own one, I am part of Nike Town Runners and I go to london to run with them when I can which isn't often but Team Melave is the new elite team I run with and I'm gonna need it with all my lectures starting again :)

Back in England... woo...

I can't bring myself to explain everything that i did on my holiday, i'm sure you don't want to hear it so I'll keep this short.

Me and my fiance, lovely hotel, No tours or guides, Walking (a lot of walking) all over Paris, Great food, Great museums, Great fucking heights!, Some questionable people, Some lovely people, lots of very questionable attempts at the french language, good pictures, bad pictures, sunny days and a lot of money later and you have the best 4 days that I have had in a very long time :)...

...and I went back to that alley way and took a picture. Those Parisian scum haven't scared me!

Paris Holiday

Thats me and my friend Matt when I went to Paris when I was 18 and got my head kicked in, in an alley way but don't worry I got back to my hotel with my phone and wallet, maybe they just didn't like me?

Anyway I'm in desperate need of a holiday and my mum has kindly given me a holiday to Paris with my fiance :) originally in the hotel where I stayed first but obviously moved it to another area! I can't fucking wait my iPod touch has a translator app so i can kinda speak french and I can forget about work :)

A biento!

21

I turned the BIG 21 yesterday and my first thought was... fuck! I am now completely clear of the safety net that is considered a teenager. I am now a young adult, to me this means one of the biggest years of my life as a major life shift is coming when i graduate and i step blinking into the real world for the first time. Will it be everything I imagined? well no it won't be I havnt been living under a rock at university! it wont because I'm not rich living in the playboy mansion, 6ft 2 blonde and work as a professional worlds sexiest man! just kidding i dont need to be 6ft 2...

Questions questions questions are everywhere when your 21:

Will i get a job i like?

Where will i live?

Will i have to go back home or chance it in london?

Will i get the degree i want / maybe deserve?

Do i keep a safe job in a shop till the credit bollocks is over?

Should i send cvs now?

Have i enough things on my cv?

Am i good enough for the job i want?

Will i be alone?

Will i find someone?

You know, crap like this instead of my usual dilemma of which to scratch first my arse or my balls.

Good news is though now i'm 21 i can legally adopt a child (africa here i come).

Bad news is If i commit a bad enough crime i will be sent to prison no ifs or buts bit of a bummer... but i can drink in America woo and own a firearm legally what a great mix, might not go to America too soon.

The best i can hope for is to be happy failing this I can now also become a member of parliament so i will change the laws accordingly. 1st on my list would be to give me a job I really want then i will quit and do that instead. see not just a pretty face, i'm also slightly mad :) but at least i have a plan... of sorts. 

Witness the Fitness.

A new year, a new start... well kinda. Those of you who know me well enough know that i love to run, i recommend it to everyone, nothing helps me cope with the stress of everything better well apart from one thing :)

Anyway so a new toy has found its way in to my lap! the new iPod touch which is magic and I mean actual wizards must live in this thing because its just impossible! I'm not writing a review i just can't help it :)

Nike+ is one of the best uses of digital media I have ever seen since facebook (still not reviewing ;) I have a chip inside my shoe that talks to my iPod telling it my speed and distance depending on the work out that I have set which is usually running a mile as fast as i can and a longer 1 hour run at the week end.

How ever this is just the start because when i get home i connect it up to my mac and it uploads the information onto my online account where I'm called davelawrie+ (yes... can you guess i'm in advertising?) 

I have a little character mini me which is a bit too flipping a like! I can see the all knowing nods of 'bloody student' already... but what i like best is the community side of it, apart from face book i have never gone into the world of online social networks outside close friends but with this I have created a team, 'melave' which is just me and my fiance and we get invited run with other people around really nice tracks not just the road where I live lol but you can also sign yourself up to nike+ races in places like New York or London. There called challenges where you can run 3 or 5 or 7 miles, once completed it uploads to your account and you get stuff for how far or how fast you run and a higher status for challenges as well if you like that kinda thing but what i like is how it charts your progress I can for once actually see myself getting better.

I have never been a fan of nike and have only agreed with one of there slogans which was about how running is 'an addiction' but nike + combines everything I love with ease, my first proper holistic branding experience and i have to admit nike has gone up a lot in my books.

The Death of my Dissertation

Heres my dissertation printing...

Heres my dissertation fresh off the press...

Here's my dissertation bound and ready...

Here's my dissertation with CD in the library...

Here is where it all ended. Months of relentless work, our hearts and souls put into the form of size 12, 1.5 line spaced words... right into a battered old cardboard box that was in the corner under a table...  worth it! 

so thats it dead and dusted. I will not say another word, it's just over.

The magical 10,000

Not many things move me to tears... and this wasn't one of them either but I felt very incredibly good. 

The magical 10,000 word mark seems to be impossible when you first start, its like looking up at the top of a mountain before you plan to climb it.

This is just a first draft but I have my team of expert proof readers (my mum) on the case. Now for the obligatory all nighter on thursday to make sure every little thing is perfect :)

Good Luck all my course mates :) and go fuck yourself Mr Harvard who ever you were!!!

U.C.engAged

I got fed up of writing about the academic side of university as the biggest part of my whole university experience was meeting my fiance. Yes thats right I said fiance :)

A lot of students come to UNI with their college sweetheart but I have seen it fail so many times it's enough to make you lose faith in love all together. There's this myth that when you come to UNI the idea is to get with as many people as possible which is why we have to suffer the shit ads about 'stds' and to some sad people that is what it's about (not the std's).

I was amazingly lucky meeting Mel. It wasn't the most romantic of beginnings (drunken kiss) but 2 years later and a proposal at Reading Festival '07' and I've never been happier :)

I know lots of people who have met their current partners at UNI and by current partners I mean a partner that could be the one, not who the hell are you get out of my room current partner. 

Its the one thing no manual or student guide can help you with I'm afraid. You may be a skeptic and want to be out there and single before you "settle down" but to me this all depends on your idea of settling down. It's a stupid term because who wants to settle for anything? it implies there's something better. If your thinking kids, a house, a mortgage and a car all ready then please for the love of god! your with the wrong person, get away quick.

With the right person very little should change in regards with all the things you want to do in your life. The only difference is now you have someone to share it with, someone who can add more to the things you will do. They are much better than your best friends (you can't do certain things with your best friends... well not usually).

I've seen people not give anyone a chance in terms of giving it a go and their paying for it now.

I'm rambling on but I really do feel incredibly lucky. To find someone who your not thinking about "settling down with" rather carrying on the adventure with i'd imagine is bloody difficult. So heres to everyone at UNI who has 'a someone' not just with someone.

Creative campaign Project Presentation...

As presentations go this one has to be in my top 3. At the beginning of this course, presenting was some what of a weekly hell, getting up in front of everyone to have them judge you like an animal and then at the end have "feedback" (they never held back) from people who know about as much as you do which seems pointless but the result is that now we are all very good at it (well most of us(that will drive them crazy if they read this, who could I mean hmmm,,,).

I was very proud of my ideas the images are but one out of 5 briefs that I did the rest you can view on my website :) I did the drawings with Crayola Crayons! nursery kids kiss my ass (not literally) I just raised the bar you little snot bags.

So celebrations are in order... well no not quite everyone got a weeks extension for their dissertations cuz george complained (thank you very much george) :) and so I have another week with no sunlight till it's done 

One small step for man, one giant leap towards my degree.

Business Vs Pleasure

Some people say never mix business with pleasure, well they obviously are alone and cry themselves to sleep every night out of how boring a person they are.

If there was no pleasure in business or in my case working on UCA stuff, i'd have long thrown myself off the top of the library long ago...

It is an amazingly difficult skill separating the two. In the first year your natural choice being at the beginning of your career is to spend long hours devoted to pleasure, In year two your either one or the other and your either in a frame of mind where you think you should be working harder or your thinking you should be being crazier because your at UNI. These two feelings interchange frequently.

You get to third year, the dreaded 70% of your marks go to your degree and so it's down to some serious work interspersed with serious pleasure, it doesn't happen as often as you'd like (unless you don't care about your marks and continue going out every night!) but when you do it can get rather messy as all that pent up energy just comes bursting out and makes you do things like as I saw, one of your friends being kidnapped off the street for his birthday!

It is so important to keep this balance because after all your only at UNI once and you don't want to waste it on both sides of the equation.

Right now I should be doing more work or in bed sleeping but I'm on here writing because it is part of my pleasure to write such bollocks, it's not goin out getting wrecked and waking up with the brazilian volley ball team but its something.

All ways have those little things that get you through the day if its blogging, great! if it's sex lucky you ;) if you can do something for someone else who's really stressed at the moment do it (if your a hot guy or girl have sex with them... just a suggestion...) 

hard work sucks but UNI just wouldn't be the same with out it.

Burning the midnight oil

'Burning the midnight oil'

An expression that gives that all too familiar sinking feeling to any creative that hears it. Why? because it means pain... emotional and physical pain but to us students it simply means normal working hours for a big project.

I'm in full deadline meeting mode with my first big presentation of the new year looming, I'm armed with my cups of Tea, Relentless (aka legal speed) and so I'm ready for a week of barely any sleep, blood shot eyes, mood swings, minor psychotic episodes, major forgetfulness (did I remember to...) and very irregular eating habits e.g. buttered toast and prawn cocktail crisp sandwiches at 3 am (don't knock it till you've tried it honestly...)

Why do I do it? because there's nothing quite like putting your all in to something to have it pay off, you feel like god, well I imagine thats how he must feel anyway.

It is easier to forget the work you put in than to remember what you got out of it, however this comes with one massive howling exception... if you fail.

Then it really was just a few weeks of your life you could have spent having a lot more fun.

But hey nothing in life comes easy and all that shit that was designed to make you feel better in the face of crushing defeat.

Am I a pessimist? I don't think so I'm not afraid to fail, your talking to the guy who in his first year did a whole presentation and was told at the end I had missed everything on the brief, needless to to say I learnt from that particular mistake.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I hate working ridiculous hours for weeks on end for something that could be shit anyway, unless its a success then I love it, hows that for profound...

The best letter to put in a post.

"Tea! Thats all I needed! Good cup of tea! Super-heated infusion of free-radicals and tannins - Just the thing for healing the synapses!" The Doctor

I have to get my fix of tea every morning or my brain just sulks in my skull, refusing to get out of bed (much like me). 

Forget coffee, all that causes is a heart beat of a rabbit, nausea and a horrible come down.

Tea my friends is the way forward! I owe my dissertation being on schedule to that gentle infusion.

Drink Tea, It really is my advice to any one who sits in front of a computer for hours on end.

It no longer belongs to the old or those fucking annoying middle aged women who call it a "cuppa"

 It now belongs to the strong minded people of the world who can say NO! to Starbucks and want to make a statement about what they drink. 

Tea is not a drink, It's a movement!

T-Rules!

Rubix Dude

This was my courses original logo which I have since updated but its all hush hush so I can't show you but take my word for it, it's mesmerizing, wonderful a tour de force :) well hopefully.

My course leader wanted some kind of promotion that he could give to perspective students, I looked into my research as I will be properly re-branding the whole course for my final project and I thought to make the logo into a Rubix Cube. Apart from it being a highly collectible toy, its likeness to the existing logo is great and I love the connotations with problem solving which in essence is what design and advertising is.

Here it is!!! I went to my lecture room for a tutorial and it was just sitting there, I had sent the designs over a month ago and had heard nothing of it since. It was a really odd experience to see something I had made on a mac screen existing quite peacefully on the table, I guess thats what pro designers feel when they happen on something they've made.

I immediately stole it of-course, I kinda own it...

I can not wait to get started on the re-brand after this I'm buzzing to do more.

Business Cards!!!

My first professional design gone and come back successfully from print!

As you know, Yellow Brick Road Consulting is my first design account that I won via a competition.

These are the first of the promotional materials I have been working on for Alex to come back from the printers and they look amazing, not just business cards but good business cards and as Alex tells me are the subject of much conversation at his own client meetings.

I'm really looking forward to seeing how the rest comes out, the brand has very suddenly become real and it is just great to see my work working :)

Theres only one DAVE LAWRIE, ONE DAVE LAWRIE!

Out of a possible 494,000 results, out of all the Dave Lawrie's in the world (well on the web) I come out tops on the ole google.

*proud*

Cometh the hour...

12 days untill dissertation hand in... am I scared...yes, although that would be an understatement, the whole experience is terrifying especially as I am not a natural born writer.

The feeling of going through the whole dissertation experience (I find) is more close to that of having just trod on a mine...

If I step off the mine (my desk + comp) I blow up (fail) standing there I am focused on what is happening, everything fades into nothing but... I am safe (I will pass) 

It's an odd sensation, half of you is convinced that if you stay (working) your fine, the other half, if you go you die, so naturally you stay.

Enough time passes and then you start thinking you can make it if you just run very fast (rush it) and if you don't you convince yourself you could take the pain and live with the disfigurement (the poor mark or failure and emotional scars) 

Every now and again you drift off and you forget where you are (the pub) but the hooded man with a scythe is serving the drinks.

You could call for help but only you properly understand the state your in so what do you do? you could always try denial, denial is great because everything is fine.

But no... we wait... its safer until doomsday, then we have no choice but to make the leap (hand it in) and trust it won't all explode... 

I'd be comfier under the Damocles Sword 

but it will also be all over soon and I can hopefully get back to normal because is you've just read that analogy you can see something isn't quite right upstairs.

Good Luck to all my fellow Dissertationers I have a lot of respect for you especially if your from a strictly non writing dicipline. I hope it all goes well

Web 2.Dave

Just some web design from an ill spent (literally) afternoon. 

Its so much harder than it looks. Now I can see why it takes so long.

Sick Day Smick Pay

What did you get for christmas? I got loads of amazing presents and had a great christmas as I did sweet F.A. but enjoyed myself, work was very much at the back of my mind, which made it all the sweeter.

Now that I'm back, I thought I would get some work done before the new year celebrations. However the powers that be had other plans and have struck me down with Mr Flu, I say Mr because I have man flu which is a lot worse ;).

I guess work will have to wait (oh no...) 

I can honestly say it's only at UNI where being ill is not that much of an inconvenience, sound strange? it's not as strange as putting yourself in over 27,000 pounds worth of debt before having even started. 

We're just nutters us students.

The Wrong Impression.

Working hard or hardly working?

This wasn't exactly the impression I had imagined hard work would earn me!!!

Xx Merry Christmas xxX

www.davelawrie.com

www.davelawrie.com - not finished but is a web presence of sorts :) I love my logo 

(good job really...)

Job Offer!!!

Hooray no more need for this blog...

Just kidding, I did however get a job offer of sorts. My CV is available online to a bunch of recruiting agencies. I joined just to see what would happen as a lot of students do. To my absolute surprise I had a phone call a couple of days later from a very nice lady offering me a temporary position in a design agency in Ipswich.

Politely I told her that I hadn't graduated yet but it was good to know that it worked! the lady was very nice about it and I hung up the phone.

It may not sound, much but to me it was huge, I had a big smile on my face thinking "I might just be able to do this" I take any feel goodness when ever I can (not that kind of 'taken' happiness! you stereotyping boring businessman!)

So there you go all you creative industry folk if you want to feel good but don't particularly want to give anyone money, email a student to tell them their work is very good and guaranteed they will be on a (legal) high of esteem.

Part time jobs with full time losers.

This post is for all the students out there with a part time job.

They hire us knowing we need the money and that most of the time live very far away, they are sympathetic to our situation. 

In fact my boss is so nice and is so understanding of how short of cash I am, she gave me a late shift christmas eve and an early shift the day after boxing day. This means that not only am I earning a bit of extra money, I'm also saving a lot of money by not being able to go home to see my family at all. Proof that some bosses really do go beyond the call of duty...

More time for my dissertation too! 

Merry Christmas

Distractions!!!

Students have a knack of finding ways to do anything but their work, if they say they don't their big fat liars. Here is the latest of my finds :) 5 mins not much but enough...well back to work :(

Have you ever wondered what a dissertation looks like? (I'm here to prevent a widow)

Well now you can stop wondering :) I must apologise as this photo isn't entirely accurate, you see I mopped up the blood, sweat, hair and tears (possibly urine) before I took the picture. technically I should have made a sped up motion movie capturing 3 months of time but this would have resulted in a movie sadder than lassie and possibly more violent than hostel 1 and 2

Who ever said you shouldn't mix business with pleasure? a complete douche! thats for sure.